Sunday, September 18, 2005

Thank You for Caring

Arrive at Airport

2:34 AM

Arrive at Work

8:00 AM

Thank you for caring!

Note to self: see post Shut the Fuck Up by Dr. Denis Leary

Wednesday, September 14, 2005

It’s Impossible to Touch You

I'm sorry to break it to you my friend but no one in their right mind would want to touch someone who thinks bathing is a sin. If you don't believe me try breathing in the vicinity of your security guy this morning.

Sunday, September 11, 2005







Saturday, September 10, 2005

Pick a Finger?! Any Finger?!

خمسيني خدش حياء مواطن بـ «إصبعه»

كتب طلال فيصل: بـ «الاصبع» خدش مواطن خمسيني حياء آخر مرات عدة في المناسبات والأماكن العامة، وسجلت قضية، وفي المقابل اتهم الطرف الثاني، الاول بأنه ايضاً خدش حياءه بـ «ألفاظ نابية» وأصر على تسجيل قضية.

ووفقاً لقول مصدر أمني «فإن المتقدم بالبلاغ (الأول) ذكر انه انزعج من خدش الحياء المتكرر وأراد ان يضع حداً لتصرفاته الصبيانية، خاصة بعدما أصرّ ابنه على تسجيل قضية، حيث قال له: «اذا ما ترفع قضية,,, لا أنت أبوي ولا أنا ولدك».

Pick a Finger?!
Any Finger?!

Thursday, September 08, 2005

Shut the Fuck Up by Dr. Denis Leary

An excerpt from Denis Leary’s standup act “No Cure for Cancer”

God.. "I'm just not happy. I'm just not happy. I'm just not happy because my life didn't turn out the way I thought it would." Hey! Join the fucking club, ok!? I thought I was going to be the starting center fielder for the Boston Red Socks. Life sucks, get a fucking helmet, allright?! "I'm not happy. I'm not happy." Nobody's happy, ok!? Happiness comes in small doses folks. It's a cigarette, or a chocolate cookie, or a five second orgasm. That's it, ok! You cum, you eat the cookie, you smoke the butt, you go to sleep, you get up in the morning and go to fucking work, ok!? That is it! End of fucking list! "I'm just not happy." Shut the fuck up, allright? That's the name of my new book, "Shut the Fuck Up, by Doctor Denis Leary. A revolutionary new form of therapy." I'm gonna have my patients come in. "Doctor, I.." "Shut the fuck up, next!" "I don't feel so.." "Shut the fuck up, next!" "He made me feel so much better about myself, you know? He just told me to shut the fuck up and nobody had ever told me that before. I feel so much better now." Whining fucking maggots.

Every time you feel like sharing your shitty day with someone please consider the above.


Wednesday, September 07, 2005

Brain Freeze

I Scream,

You scream,

We all scream,



Pappy O'Daniel: Shake a leg Junior! Thank God your mammy died givin' birth. If she'd have seen you, she'd have died o' shame.

Pappy O'Daniel: I'll press your flesh, you dimwitted sumbitch! You don't tell your pappy how to court the electorate. We ain't one-at-a-timin' here. We're MASS communicating!

A few memorable 1950’s red neck quotes from the movie “O Brother, Where Art Thou?”

Monday, September 05, 2005

Somewhere in Hawali

I was tempted to steal the poster and place it in my room. But I took the high road.

Public Service Announcement

جمع "الطارقة" هو الطوارق



VW Touareq

This means that despite them stopping the عانية they will still keep the tradition of giving the groom the gift of the VW Touareq. Since 2003 it was deemed more appropriate to give the Touareq instead of the tired old tradition of giving sheep.

Sunday, September 04, 2005

The Lights Are On...But Nobody's Home!

I'm leaving it up to you to decide the word that best describes the who wrote the comment in today’s Al Qabas above Britney Spears’s picture.

القبس 4/9/2005

Note: This is not a vote. The pull down menu is just there for your entertainment.

Hard Liquor – Starbucks Mishref

Don't know what Bourbon is?

Friday, September 02, 2005

جنس ثالث ريال

القبس 2/9/2005

Below please find examples of

الجنس الثالث

Note: the pictures are not related to the story above, they are purely for educational reasons.